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be speechless； already； or at least for a month or so； I'm little
better than a teetoller … I beg pardon； a teetotaller。 It is not
exactly physical； for I am in good health； working four or five
hours a day in my plantation； and intending to ride a paper…chase
next Sunday … ay； man； that's a fact； and I havena had the hert to
breathe it to my mother yet … the obligation's poleetical； for I am
trying every means to live well with my German neighbours … and； O
Barrie； but it's no easy！ To be sure； there are many exceptions。
And the whole of the above must be regarded as private … strictly
private。 Breathe it not in Kirriemuir： tell it not to the
daughters of Dundee！ What a nice extract this would make for the
daily papers！ and how it would facilitate my position here！ 。 。 。
AUGUST 5TH。
This is Sunday； the Lord's Day。 'The hour of attack approaches。'
And it is a singular consideration what I risk； I may yet be the
subject of a tract； and a good tract too … such as one which I
remember reading with recreant awe and rising hair in my youth； of
a boy who was a very good boy； and went to Sunday Schule； and one
day kipped from it； and went and actually bathed； and was dashed
over a waterfall； and he was the only son of his mother； and she
was a widow。 A dangerous trade； that； and one that I have to
practise。 I'll put in a word when I get home again； to tell you
whether I'm killed or not。 'Accident in the （Paper） Hunting Field：
death of a notorious author。 We deeply regret to announce the
death of the most unpopular man in Samoa； who broke his neck at the
descent of Magagi； from the misconduct of his little raving lunatic
of an old beast of a pony。 It is proposed to commemorate the
incident by the erection of a suitable pile。 The design （by our
local architect； Mr。 Walker） is highly artificial； with a rich and
voluminous Crockett at each corner； a small but impervious Barrieer
at the entrance； an arch at the top； an Archer of a pleasing but
solid character at the bottom； the colour will be genuine William…
Black； and Lang； lang may the ladies sit wi' their fans in their
hands。' Well； well； they may sit as they sat for me； and little
they'll reck； the ungrateful jauds！ Muckle they cared about
Tusitala when they had him！ But now ye can see the difference；
now； leddies； ye can repent； when ower late； o' your former
cauldness and what ye'll perhaps allow me to ca' your TEPEEDITY！
He was beautiful as the day； but his day is done！ And perhaps； as
he was maybe gettin' a wee thing fly…blawn； it's nane too shune。
MONDAY； AUGUST 6TH。
Well； sir； I have escaped the dangerous conjunction of the widow's
only son and the Sabbath Day。 We had a most enjoyable time； and
Lloyd and I were 3 and 4 to arrive； I will not tell here what
interval had elapsed between our arrival and the arrival of 1 and
2； the question； sir； is otiose and malign； it deserves； it shall
have no answer。 And now without further delay to the main purpose
of this hasty note。 We received and we have already in fact
distributed the gorgeous fahbrics of Kirriemuir。 Whether from the
splendour of the robes themselves； or from the direct nature of the
compliments with which you had directed us to accompany the
presentations； one young lady blushed as she received the proofs of
your munificence。 。 。 。 Bad ink； and the dregs of it at that； but
the heart in the right place。 Still very cordially interested in
my Barrie and wishing him well through his sickness； which is of
the body； and long defended from mine； which is of the head； and by
the impolite might be described as idiocy。 The whole head is
useless； and the whole sitting part painful： reason； the recent
Paper Chase。
There was racing and chasing in Vailile plantation；
And vastly we enjoyed it；
But； alas！ for the state of my foundation；
For it wholly has destroyed it。
Come； my mind is looking up。 The above is wholly impromptu。 … On
oath；
TUSITALA。
AUGUST 12； 1894
And here； Mr。 Barrie； is news with a vengeance。 Mother Hubbard's
dog is well again … what did I tell you？ Pleurisy； pneumonia； and
all that kind of truck is quite unavailing against a Scotchman who
can write … and not only that； but it appears the perfidious dog is
married。 This incident； so far as I remember； is omitted from the
original epic …
She went to the graveyard
To see him get him buried；
And when she came back
The Deil had got merried。
It now remains to inform you that I have taken what we call here
'German offence' at not receiving cards； and that the only
reparation I will accept is that Mrs。 Barrie shall incontinently
upon the receipt of this Take and Bring you to Vailima in order to
apologise and be pardoned for this offence。 The commentary of
Tamaitai upon the event was brief but pregnant： 'Well； it's a
comfort our guest…room is furnished for two。'
This letter； about nothing； has already endured too long。 I shall
just present the family to Mrs。 Barrie … Tamaitai； Tamaitai Matua；
Teuila； Palema； Loia； and with an extra low bow； Yours；
TUSITALA。
Letter： TO DR。 BAKEWELL
VAILIMA； AUGUST 7； 1894。
DEAR DR。 BAKEWELL； … I am not more than human。 I am more human
than is wholly convenient； and your anecdote was welcome。 What you
say about UNWILLING WORK； my dear sir； is a consideration always
present with me； and yet not easy to give its due weight to。 You
grow gradually into a certain income； without spending a penny
more； with the same sense of restriction as before when you
painfully scraped two hundred a year together； you find you have
spent； and you cannot well stop spending； a far larger sum； and
this expense can only be supported by a certain production。
However； I am off work this month； and occupy myself instead in
weeding my cacao； paper chases； and the like。 I may tell you； my
average of work in favourable circumstances is far greater than you
suppose： from six o'clock till eleven at latest； and often till
twelve； and again in the afternoon from two to four。 My hand is
quite destroyed； as you may perceive； to…day to a really unusual
extent。 I can sometimes write a decent fist still； but I have just
returned with my arms all stung from three hours' work in the
cacao。 … Yours； etc。；
R。 L。 S。
Letter： TO JAMES PAYN
VAILIMA； UPOLU； SAMOA ＇AUGUST 11； 1894＇。
MY DEAR JAMES PAYN； … I hear from Lang that you are unwell； and it
reminds me of two circumstances： First； that it is a very long
time since you had the exquisite pleasure of hearing from me； and
second； that I have been very often unwell myself； and sometimes
had to thank you for a grateful anodyne。
They are not good； the circumstances； to write an anodyne letter。
The hills and my house at less than （boom） a minute's interval
quake with thunder； and though I cannot hear that part of it；
shells are falling thick into the fort of Luatuanu'u （boom）。 It is
my friends of the CURACOA； the FALKE； and the BUSSARD bombarding
（after all these … boom … months） the rebels of Atua。 （Boom…boom。）
It is most distracting in itself； and the thought of the poor
devils in their fort （boom） with their bits of rifles far from
pleasant。 （Boom…boom。） You can see how quick it goes； and I'll
say no more about Mr。 Bow…wow； only you must understand the
perpetual accompaniment of this discomfortable sound； and make
allowances for the value of my copy。 It is odd； though； I can well
remember； when the Franco…Prussian war began； and I was in Eilean
Earraid； far enough from the sound of the loudest cannonade； I
could HEAR the shots fired； and I felt the pang in my breast of a
man struck。 It was sometimes so distressing； so instant； that I
lay in the heather on the top of the isla